Whispers in the Wind
by Anthraviolets
Summary: Spottedwing, a RoseClan warrior has two half-Clan kits; Sweetkit and Leafkit. She's found out by the leader, Mistyrose, and her kits are forced to watch her die right in front of their young eyes. Now apprentices, Leafpaw has been dislocated with the entirety of reality and Sweetpaw is worried. Leafpaw has been overthinking things, and little does he know what his paws will do...


**A/N: This was originally going to be a part of my challenges book, but I felt like some of the themes in here are a bit too much for T rated stories, so it's rated M for safety reasons. It contains brutal murder (or at the least kinda descriptive mentions of it), attempted suicide, and cutting (and mentions of it). So read at your own risk, and I might just make a part two of this but for now it's complete. This is Whispers in the Winds, and is a challenge for SongClan, 3,695 words total.**

* * *

 **~Spottedwing POV~**

Spottedwing gazed wearily at her kits, breathing heavily. She'd brought them into this world, and soon the Clan would welcome them. Well, she _hoped_. Glancing down at the two little kits, she lapped the fur of the stronger, bigger one. The tom had long pale gray fur that shone in the moonlight, with the white chest fur that gleamed as if it was the moon itself. _Sweetkit,_ She mused, reminding herself of the name she'd blessed this kitten with. _After the sweet tom who'd helped me love again._ Spottedwing had been mates with a tom named Acornbark, who lived in the same Clan as her; QuailClan. However, he'd died of greencough shortly after giving birth to her first litter.

 _Heatherpaw, Mothpaw, and Dewpaw. Our lovely kits._ Spottedwing loved them dearly, and they did the same with her. But Spottedwing knew that she wanted to be a mother once more, despite the fact that no toms in the Clan were willing to father another litter. So she began looking outside of the Clan, despite it being wrong to do so. _And then I met the sweetest tom, Skipcloud._

Skipcloud was a wonderful and kind tom who always knew what to say. She could name his features on the spot; he had pale gray, short sleek fur and had a white patch of fur on his chest, along with soft yellow eyes that warmed her like the sun. But then they began meeting, and then… Spottedwing sighed. _Half-Clan blood is frowned upon,_ She reminded herself. _I was so foolish. Our kits will suffer because of our mistake._

Sweetkit was suckling at her stomach, while the runt of the two was struggling to get any milk. The runt, Leafkit, was a speckled brown tom with white paws, like Spottedwing herself. _Oh, my kits…,_ She wanted to coo, but she held herself back. _I can't do much but hope for the best._ Pricking her ears up, she overheard pawsteps entering the nursery. A slender brown she-cat padded into the den, her hackles raised. Her blue eyes had an arrogant aura to them, which seemed to grow stronger as she stepped closer to Spottedwing.

"Spottedwing, I heard you've kitted already," She meowed, glancing down at the kits. "Quite odd considering you were expecting kits in the first place, you've never been close to any tom within RoseClan. Even if you asked a tom in the Clan to father your kits...they wouldn't have this build."

The queen's eyes widened in terror. "Mistyrose, please. There's nothing wrong with my kits."

Mistyrose glowered her. "What are you hiding, Spottedwing?" She snarled, her tail lashing. Leafkit began to wail, along with his brother Sweetkit. "Who is their father? Are they of WillowClan?" Mistyrose dropped her voice to a whisper like growl.

"My leader, my kits are of full RoseClan blood like their Clanmates. Just leave me and my kits be."

The brown she-cat narrowed her eyes. "Have you ever heard of Ospreyface, the warrior who was of StormClan and RoseClan blood?" Spottedwing shook her head, slightly curious. "He was a strong and loyal warrior, but what happened to him when he was found out? He was killed on the spot. Ospreyface died because he was half-Clan, and do you know which Clan it was that he was raised in? Guess."

Spottedwing gulped. Leafkit and Sweetkit could be killed because of her and Skipcloud. Mistyrose only glared at the tiny kits, anger in her eyes.

"Tell me, Spottedwing, so we can get this over with already. Who's their father?" She repeated, a hint of snarl in her meow. _I can't tell her, I can't…_ But would Mistyrose even care if she said it or not? Spottedwing wanted her kits safe, but she knew there was no way out of this situation.

"Skipcloud of WillowClan."

Mistyrose hissed at her, unsheathing her claws. "So they _are_ half-Clan freaks! Spottedwing, you knew this was wrong. And yet you did it anyways. You know the rules; half-Clan cats get killed on spot."

Spottedwing protectively wrapped her tail around her kits. "You will not harm a whisker on these innocent kits. Answer a question for me, Mistyrose. Would you rather get rid of a traitor to the Clan, or get rid of kits who'd grow to become warriors of RoseClan?"

The leader narrowed her eyes. "Very well. You'll raise these kits until they have been weaned, and then…you know what will be coming for you." _My precious kits, oh how I wish I could be with you your whole lives through..._

* * *

 **~Mistyrose POV~**

Mistyrose padded up to Spottedwing, who was watching Sweetkit and Leafkit play with a feather. _Half-Clan scum,_ She thought, glaring at the kits strong, muscular features that made them stick out from their lean and agile Clanmates. _WillowClan freaks don't belong here._ The leader forced a grin on her face as she neared them.

"So, Spottedwing…are Leafkit and Sweetkit eating prey yet?" She asked as Leafkit and Sweetkit curiously stared up at her, awe in their eyes. _Poor kits,_ Mistyrose wanted to sigh. _I'm not who you think I am._ Spottedwing nodded, her jaws clamped shut. "I hope you understand what you're going to go through, because there's no turning back now."

The brown she-cat walked over to the Skyledge, looking down at her cats. _And today is the day a traitor is revealed,_ She sighed. From the corner of her eye, she saw cats gathering under, beginning to notice her presence there. _This will be a horrible day in RoseClan's history._ Spottedwing only blinked at her, sadness in her gaze. Mistyrose felt a prickle of regret, but pushed it away; her duty was to the Clan, not a lying traitor.

Mistyrose yowled, "Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey gather under Skyledge for a Clan meeting!" Her Clanmates below her looked up, curiosity and anxiety smeared into their faces. _I hate to do this, but…_ "Cats of RoseClan, I have some grave news to share. Among us all, there is a traitor in our midst who broke the code. And that code breaker is willing to pay the price for their actions, right Spottedwing?" Cats whipped their gazes to Spottedwing, shock and rage in their eyes. Leafkit and Sweetkit only backed away from the cat they called mother, fear in their eyes.

Sweetkit whispered, "Did you really break the code, Spottedwing?" A stab of grief twisted Mistyrose's heart. She didn't want to do this, and break a happy family apart. Even if tradition said otherwise. _But Ospreyface was meant to be taken away from his mate Sunnyglen and their daughter Mistypaw._

The speckled brown queen nodded, gazing up at Mistyrose. "I did break the code. I took a WillowClan mate, and on accident had Leafkit and Sweetkit. All I ask is that you don't harm them, but harm the traitor standing before you; the one who'll only betray you again, and again, and again."

One of Spottedwing's kits, Mothpaw only sobbed. "You tricked us! Why should we trust you?!" He wailed, his brown and white pelt bristling with rage.

Spottedwing only blinked at him. "Because there is no use in keeping me here any longer. Kill me, cast me out, do whatever that suits your needs, Mistyrose. Just don't kill the kits."

"Very well," Mistyrose replied, trying to remain unemotional for the sake of her Clan's sanity. _Spottedwing, may you find StarClan in your sleep._ "Kill the traitor, and make sure she stays dead."

A black tom leaped for her at once, his green eyes gleaming with excitement and rage. He aimed for her muzzle and knocked her off her feet; Spottedwing feel to the ground. He raked his claws against her underbelly, letting her screeches echo in the camp. Sweetkit only stared at his mother's attacker in anger, while Leafkit had his eyes wide, dampened with terror and tears. Mistyrose closed her eyes, feeling sick to her stomach. _I've failed these three cats, and the stars themselves._

* * *

 **~Sweetpaw POV~**

"Stop daydreaming, half-Clan filth!" Gazing up, Sweetpaw realized it was his mentor, Houndfang. Houndfang was a young soft furred black tom with green eyes, and had a sharp tongue. "What was Mistyrose even thinking, giving me a worthless cat like you?"

Sweetpaw looked at his paws. "I don't know."

Houndfang only snorted. "Of course you don't know. Like I was asking you," He snapped, looking off in the direction of the camp's exit. _I never know anything,_ He mused. _Why did Spottedwing have to die?_ After the she-cat's death, no cat had wanted anything to do with Sweetpaw or Leafpaw any more. _Why must StarClan be so cruel? Why did Mistyrose make that awful command?_

 _Spottedwing promised…,_ Sweetpaw choked out. _You promised to teach us how to fish, how to fight like RoseClan warriors, how to collect shells by the river…and you're gone. You broke your promise._ He could remember everything that went down on that day, every little detail. From seeing Spottedwing torn apart by his Clanmates to watching as they left his mother's body to rot, far away from the normal burial grounds.

Oh, how he wanted to tear his Clanmates apart just like they'd done with Spottedwing, their organs trailing from their flesh just as he'd seen so young, the image burned into his skull. But he didn't bother to make a fuss about it, even to himself. _They'll get what's coming to them one day…I hope._

"I'll be finding my brother, Houndfang. Especially if all you feel like doing today is throwing insults at me instead of training me, like you're supposed to do," Sweetpaw hissed at the black tom, ignoring his threats as he padded away. _Like I care anymore._ He sat beside Leafpaw, who was only staring at the fresh kill pile at a distance. "Is everything okay?"

Leafpaw only blinked at him, his copper eyes showing nothing as to how he felt. "I guess." He only dug his claws into the earth, clawing up some grass. _Such a good liar,_ He thought. _Like Spottedwing._

Sweetpaw licked his brother's ear. "Leafpaw, you should tell me if anything's wrong. I'd help."

"What's the point of helping others?" He sighed, padding away from Sweetpaw. _Leafpaw! What's wrong with you, and why won't you tell me?_ But by the time Sweetpaw had gotten off his haunches, Leafpaw had left for the apprentices' den. Sweetpaw just couldn't place his paw on what was up with Leafpaw; was it Spottedwing? _It could be._

Glancing away from his brother, he spotted his half siblings, Mothfur, Heatherfield, and Dewheart. Mothfur's brown and white fur shimmered in the sunlight, just like Spottedwing's pelt had in the sunny days of Sweetpaw's youth. He had gentle green eyes as well. _Just like Spottedwing…_ But Mothfur himself was nothing like her; Mothfur was rowdy and insensitive, the most likely out of all of his half siblings to kill him or Leafpaw. Or both, if it so fancied him. Heatherfield was a brown calico she-cat with amber eyes, nothing like Spottedwing in anyways at all, but not like Mothfur to Sweetpaw's relief. Dewheart was the last of the litter, with him having white fur that looked like a bright cloud on a good day. Dewheart was a kind, bubbly tom whose green eyes sparkled like morning dew on a warm newleaf sunrise.

Dewheart noticed Sweetpaw sitting all by himself, flicking his tail over to call him. "Hey, Sweetpaw! Come over here!" He purred. _I might as well come over to them. It's not like Houndfang will greet me like Dewheart would._ Sweetpaw begrudgingly padded over to them. "What's wrong? Did something happen with Leafpaw or Houndfang? Or was it both?"

"Something's always up with that mange-pelt," snapped Mothfur, narrowing his green eyes. "Shouldn't you be training with Houndfang, or something? Anything but being in camp?"

Sweetpaw glowered him. "Houndfang excused me for the day," He lied through gritted teeth. He didn't want to train anyways; it wasn't like he could battle train with his claws unsheathed. Heatherfield sighed.

She uttered, "If that's the case, then where is your brother Leafpaw? Did Whitewillow take him out hunting?" Sweetpaw shook his head, now realizing that Leafpaw was nowhere in camp. _Where is he?_ "We can go ahead and look around camp to check and see if he's still here. Ask Houndfang if he's seen Leafpaw." _What!?_ Sweetpaw didn't protest; he only followed Heatherfield's command and headed over to his mentor, Houndfang.

The black tom was in the middle of grooming himself as Sweetpaw neared him. _Minnow-brain,_ He growled to himself. Houndfang looked up at him, dismay in his green eyes.

"What, WillowClan scum?" He snarled.

Sweetpaw hissed at him. "Leafpaw is gone, and we need to find him!"

Houndfang glared at Sweetpaw. "Why should I care about him? He's just another mouth to feed."

"Because he's a cat, just like you. And if you won't help him just because of his blood, then…," Sweetpaw trailed off, turning towards the exit of camp. "Go die in a ditch. I'm finding him myself."

* * *

 **~Leafpaw's POV~**

Leafpaw padded along the flowing river, letting out a small sigh. _Spottedwing, do you remember your promise after all those moons ago to teach us how to fish?_ He wished it was Spottedwing teaching him, and not Whitewillow who could only manage to fall in the river and wail for help.

"Why did Mistyrose make that command? Did she hate us, mother?" He asked, knowing he wouldn't get an answer. _Spottedwing isn't here, idiot. She might not even be in the skies with our ancestors._ "Maybe she did, but she didn't kill us like RoseClan tradition says. So did she hate us, or feel pity for us?"

But then again, she let Spottedwing be ripped apart by her Clanmates and chose to reveal the secret. _So did Mistyrose want Sweetpaw and I to suffer?_ It was logical, but then again, Mistyrose was a noble cat. _But that's what's on the inside._

Leafpaw flung a pebble into the flowing river. "I wonder what it felt like for you to get ripped apart like that, dear mother. Just how painful was it? Was it more painful knowing that your Clanmates who you lived with all your life were to end it, your first litter not laying a single paw on your attackers, or the murder itself? Or was it something else?"

He unsheathed his claws, staring at the sharp points of them. _Could I ever understand how that felt for you, Spottedwing?_ Maybe. But would Spottedwing ever understand the pain he went through everyday without her, never being able to feel her fur, smell her scent, or to curl up beside her ever again? Maybe no one besides Sweetpaw would ever understand that. _But Sweetpaw doesn't understand me as well as he thinks he does._ Leafpaw raised his paw up to his neck, his claws quaky as he thought for a brief moment. _Maybe no one will ever truly understand me, the real Leafpaw._ His claws slid against his flesh, with him sinking them in as deep as he could. Leafpaw suppressed a pained wail as he sunk them in deeper as they slid across his throat.

"Leafpaw, I found you!" Leafpaw's ears pricked up. Sweetpaw. Turning towards the direction of his brother's voice, he ignored the searing pain on his neck as well as the blood dripping from the wound. Sweetpaw stopped in place once he saw the wound on Leafpaw's neck. "What happened to you? You need to get to the medicine den at once!"

Leafpaw shrugged his shoulders. "I'm simply understanding how Spottedwing felt. Not that you would get it, anyways." His littermate's eyes widened once he saw the blood on Leafpaw's paw, and what he'd meant.

Sweetpaw narrowed his eyes. "How is hurting yourself understanding Spottedwing?! Leafpaw, this isn't right. Please, just come home with me and we'll head to the medicine den-"

"But I'm not right, I'm wrong. And I have no home that welcomes me," muttered Leafpaw, gazing at his blood stained paw. "What point is there in keeping myself safe, when I live where I'm not safe and not wanted? Because I'm crooked and twisted; not straight and pure. I don't know a single soul who'd understand this pain that I go through. You don't know me, Sweetpaw."

Sweetpaw growled softly at him, baring his teeth. "We're brothers! I understand you, Leafpaw! But you never listen, and never accept when I offer to help! I know you, but you refuse to know _me_."

Leafpaw sighed, shaking his head. "Do you know what it's like to scar yourself everyday? To wish for acceptance and true understanding? To want to join StarClan, despite knowing you'd be cast to the ranks of the Place of No Stars instead? I doubt you do. That is why you'll never understand me. Spottedwing's death killed a part of my soul, Sweetpaw. You merely see my mask, like everyone else."

"Leafpaw, please. I'm begging you. Don't hurt yourself. I care about you, and so does Heatherfield, Dewheart, and Whitewillow. Don't you know how many cats you'd be hurting by going away?" He argued, taking several paces towards Leafpaw. Sweetpaw's green eyes were glittering with terror, and looked as if he was about to start bawling.

Leafpaw glanced at his paws once more. "Yes, I do. But caring about someone is not the same as understanding someone. You may care about me, but you do not understand me," He meowed, raising his paw to strike his throat once again. _And such, living on at this point has no reasoning._ "So I shall leave you here instead, and you'd better not carry a burden upon your soul. It is what I want."

"No!" Sweetpaw yowled, tackling Leafpaw, causing his head to hit a sharp rock. _Why do you resist? You're only helping, if anything._ Leafpaw fought back, trying to shove Sweetpaw off of him. He swiped a sheathed forepaw at Sweetpaw, causing him to lose his balance and fall into the river. _Sweetpaw!_ "Leafpaw!" Leafpaw stretched his forepaw out to help his brother, hoping his tail would help him keep from falling into the river alongside his brother. Sweetpaw swiped at Leafpaw's paw but missed as he desperately tried to get a grip.

Leafpaw growled. "Sweetpaw, keep trying!"

The pale gray tom only wailed in terror. "I can't!" Sweetpaw was right; he was beginning to be washed away by the currents of the river. With a shudder, Leafpaw dived into the river and reached for Sweetpaw, trying to grab his scruff and carry him out. However, blood began trickling down his forehead as he leaped in, and his blood began mixing in with the rushing water beside himself. Despite feeling slightly hazy, Leafpaw tried to grab onto Sweetpaw, only managing to touch Sweetpaw's fur. His eyelid began to droop as the water began filling up in his mouth. Sweetpaw was already gone, away from him forever. _I'm sorry, Sweetpaw…I'm sorry for wanting to die…I'm so sorry for everything..._

* * *

 **~Houndfang's POV~**

Houndfang dragged the weak, limp body out of the river, panting heavily. _Runt,_ He growled to himself. The cat was a muscular speckled brown tom with a white chest and darker flecks, and from what Houndfang saw, had copper eyes. _I can't believe he did that._

"You're such a minnow-brain, Leafpaw," He sighed, carrying Leafpaw away from the river on his back. The apprentice was just barely breathing, to his surprise. "I'd chew you out for such behavior, but seeing as Sweetpaw's…headed off to StarClan…I won't punish you any more than fate has."

Dropping Leafpaw on the grassy ground in a small clearing, Houndfang began gathering the materials for a nest. He began building it while keeping a close eye on Leafpaw. _Don't die on me now,_ He thought. _Even if you're half-Clan._ Placing the last bit of moss in its place, Houndfang moved Leafpaw in it, grumbling to himself. He then laid down in the nest beside Leafpaw, with a small sigh.

He muttered, "You might be half-Clan, a disgrace to RoseClan with that behavior of your's, and a wanna-be hero after that stunt you pulled with your brother…but you did not deserve this happening to you. Fate was cruel to you, Leafpaw. And so was I." Leafpaw was still unconscious but breathing, much to Houndfang's relief.

"Had I not so violently and brutally murdered Spottedwing, then maybe this would've been avoided. Maybe Sweetpaw would still be alive. Maybe you wouldn't have gone and hurt yourself; I could tell from those marks on your legs and neck. StarClan has not been kind with any of us this night," mused Houndfang. He rested his muzzle on his paws, gazing at the apprentice. "You must've been desperate to end it all, weren't you? I…I'm a minnow-brain for not realizing what you were dealing with sooner, especially since I've been there myself."

Houndfang stretched his right forepaw out. "I know that you can't see it since you're knocked out, but I…hurt myself too, when I was around your age. I'd just lost my father in a battle against WillowClan, and I'd seen the WillowClan warrior who killed him. And they _won_. At the next Gathering they gloated about it, and the warrior who killed my father? He was there, and he taunted me about it and threatened to go for me next in my next battle with WillowClan, but he played it off as a joke. I didn't have very many friends in the Clan either, like you and Sweetpaw. I didn't feel cared for, I felt like no one understood me at all…I began clawing myself because I felt like it'd make me feel better. But it didn't. The scars are still here, along with the nick in my ear that I did too."

"Honestly, I feel awful. I want to make it up to you, but I know you won't trust me after this. Even if I saved you, since I've always been a fox-heart towards you. I just hope that you'll have someone who'll understand you…," He whispered, his voice hollow. "And I hope I find that someone too…"


End file.
